They say to start something new is always the toughest part. But I believe once started something, maintaining its perpetual motion is even more difficult.
I believe most people live their lives in utmost ignorance of the purpose of why they are here. The peers surrounding them define a particular course of action, a aim is set and most of us trod on that path believing that is right for us. Now don get me wrong, I don presume myself to be enlightened, but I consider myself to be woken up and aware.
If I look back at the last 25 years of my life, 75% has been spent in pursuing goals that I thought was right for me in the long run which was as defined by the society and peers around me. I admit to have lived a empty life filled with pursuing mindless goals. When a series of unfortunate incidents that came my way, I realised, whats the purpose I am chasing after something so blindly and whats the purpose of my life. I had my principles and sticking by my values was the most veneered integrity in my life. I used to be god fearing but my faith has been shaken. I am reluctant to admit that I am a borderline atheist.
I believe in realistic goals, and I have achieved them far earlier than I had anticipated. Maybe that's the reason I feel this void in me. Maybe this is what they call the mid life crisis and I am going through that at just 26. If I think about it, would I be better off living in my shell to live just like all the others, maybe yes or maybe no. There is a question of what next. Is only the chase that gave me this high. Should I redefine my goals? But what next after meeting those goals. You see its a endless and pit less cycle. Living life in the fast lane has got me nowhere. Its only got me back to the starting line. You got to relax, step back and enjoy the finest moments in your life.
Recently I was thinking about people who live up to 100 or nearing 100. What really motivates them to live so longer? They would have seen so much all around them. People younger to them passing away, Organs failing, loosing memory n motor functions. I used to think, that if i ever met with an accident and if I couldn't walk again, I would rather end my life than living that wretched and miserable existence. But now after gone through one of the worst periods of my life I believe circumstances can make you handle any god damn problem coming in your way. Nothing is perfect, its all in your mind.
The mind plays huge tricks on us. To keep it in check and free of negativity is a herculean task but you gotta do it to have peace of mind. The only way to live this life is of acceptance. Sooner or later life teaches you the same.
If you look around there are so many people suffering due to lifestyle related diseases. I am not afraid of dying and if I live up to 60 I would be more than happy. But I would like to at least achieve a couple of unrealistic goals things before that happens, like writing a book, going to the himalayas, and a world tour. I am no more afraid of following my heart and listening to my inner voice. The heart wants what it wants.
A certain friend once said, "Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting, 'WOW . . . What a ride!"
